By: Shari Dalton
Self awareness is one of the greatest traits a person can have. Being self aware means that you are very conscious of your strengths, weaknesses, feelings, motives, etc. Oftentimes, the more self aware one is, the better communicator they may be. Another term for this self awareness is EQ, emotional intelligence. Self regulation, mastering your emotions so that you can be present for other people.
Because they are aware of their own behavior, they tend to also be aware of how they are perceived by others. They can take this knowledge and create better connections with others through conversation. This is often referred to as CI, conversational intelligence. CI creates emotional connections with others through conversation to help navigate and grow together. This creates a very “we-centric” platform for conducting business.
If you are someone who feels you could be more self aware, or are like me and always on a quest to learn, here are a few tips to help create more self awareness.
- Admit that you aren’t perfect. That’s right, like any good self help book, the first step is always admission.
- Find a mentor or coach that you can trust to give you open and honest feedback. Don’t ask a close friend, they may try to sugar-coat things for the sake of your friendship. Ask someone who’s opinion you value, but someone you know will shoot you straight.
- Create a safe environment for feedback. You have to be very open to critique. You may not like what others have to say, but if your goal is to become better, you must listen and learn. Find a place where you can be comfortable and uninterrupted.
- When you’re in a group at work, practice being the last to speak. Get a good read on what’s going on. Ask lots of questions, but refrain from offering your opinion. This will help you learn about others. Reflect internally on how you may respond, but refrain. This can be especially powerful in business meetings. The more you learn about others, the more you can learn about yourself.
- Journal…or do something that allows you to release your emotions privately. I used to have something called a “Screw-It” bucket (except I used a more powerful four letter word) to release emotions when something happened that was out of my control. It helped me refocus on the things I could control instead of letting my emotions get the best of me.
“He who knows others is wise. He who knows himself is enlightened.” – Lao Tzu